Seeing Ghosts

About a week before Christmas, I woke up early one morning (around 6:00 AM) with the impression that I heard someone say my name.  I then had a strong feeling that someone was in the room standing near my bed.  I opened my eyes and looked over towards the door.  There was a man standing there.

Fear struck first, as I thought in horror that someone had broken into our house.  I immediately thought of my granddaughter, who sleeps in the room next to ours, but then remembered she had climbed into bed with us around 4:00 AM.  I sat up, and then realized that now whoever was in the room would know that I was awake.  I wondered if I should scream.  It was at that point that I realized I could see the light fixture through his head.

He stood with head in hands, and I got a feeling of despair.  I noted that he had curly hair, and that he appeared to be wearing a uniform.  I thought perhaps he was a soldier, but then decided the uniform was perhaps dark blue and more like something a mechanic would wear.  I squinted and blinked, and kept repeating to myself, "I'm not dreaming.  I'm not dreaming."  I couldn't believe what I was seeing.

Slowly, he faded away.  I looked over at my husband and granddaughter to see if either one of them had perhaps awakened to witness this apparition, but they were both fast asleep.  I looked back to where the man had been standing, and he was there again.  I tried to focus and see if I couldn't make him morph into the dream catcher hanging from the light fixture after all, proving that I was really just seeing shadows in the dark.  It was incredible to me that I should be seeing this.  I've never seen a ghost before, and found it difficult to believe that they could really appear so distinctly. 

But there he stood, head in hands.  Curly brown hair.  Uniform.  Light fixture showing faintly through his head.  And there was that feeling of despair again. 

I silently asked, "What do you want?" 

In response, he slowly began to fade away, and I felt sorry that I would never know where he came from and what he was doing in my bedroom at the approach of dawn a few days before Yule. 

In the days following, I had one friend ask if I'd noticed the increase in spirit activity the closer we got to Yule.  I was surprised to hear this, as I thought that Beltane and Samhain were the traditional times for the veil between the worlds to thin and spirit activity to increase.  My friend explained that there are more deaths around Christmas, and that would account for more spirits appearing at this time. 

Whether she is correct or not I don't know, but I do know that my father died right after Christmas in 2005, and my friend also lost her father around Christmas.  I have also never seen a spirit before, and, while I can't say for sure that that is what I saw, if there is another explanation for it, I can't think of it.  Was it just a coincidence that I saw him at this time?

Shortly after that, another friend called to ask me if I had been doing more mediumship lately.  She said that she had a couple of friends call her to say that they had been seeing more spirits lately, and that they were seeing spirits from far away.  Of course I told her my story and we both thought it was interesting.

Our house is situated very close to a cemetery.  I can see the headstones on the hills behind the house.  It's a beautiful and not a morbid view.  I love to walk there, because it is so peaceful and lovely.  Perhaps this young man came from there.  Perhaps he was from far away, as my friend suggested. 

One person pointed out to me that I'd heard my name as I awoke, but I don't know if that was perhaps part of a dream, as I was pulling out of sleep as I heard my name, but it was when I was awake that I felt someone in the room and saw the young man.  He resembled someone I knew years ago, but as far as I know, that person is still alive.

I wish I could have connected with him, and helped him.  I did ask for help for him from the angels, and so hope that he found his way to where he is supposed to be.  But I guess I will never know.